Let's See...

I went to the my old high school’s last choir concert of the year last week. There, I saw many high school people I was on friendly terms with… and realized how beautiful they were.

There was one, H, who was skinny and tall and had lovely eyes and skin and just an overall pleasant face. Sometimes I caught myself glancing over at her just to look at how pretty she was. She was the golden child of the section, and despite being older than her I was intimidated by her or shy around her and only spoke to her a few times. Did I have a crush on her? 

And another, C, was also in my section, had lovely eyes and face and a pleasant shape. I kind of talked to her. I wonder if she would have kissed me.

M had a lovely chest. Absolutely fantastic. I definitely checked her out!

Thinking about it, I checked out girls all the time in high school. I know there was one marching band rehearsal where a member of the pit was wearing a cute top that made her breasts look great! I glanced at her every chance I got. Whoops!

And there was another M who was absolutely beautiful, and when she caught on to the leggings-as-pants trend, I’d always check out her butt.

So a few nights ago, I remembered something. There was a church camp(or maybe a retreat or something) one year, and one of my friends brought a guest. The two of them proceeded to be overly-affectionate and basically joke about being lesbians. (All the while, I was like, “really? we are at a church camp right now! why are you being like that?”) 

We were doing the group stuff and sleeping at a rich friend’s house. There was a bed, and I ended up sleeping next to the guest friend. I think she made a joking/flirty comment about us laying together or making love. Of course nothing happened, but I was rather excited by the idea.

Basically there’s this girl that I might like but I’m not really sure if it’s in an “i want to be your best friend” way(because i don’t have many friends right now and i spend kind of a lot of time with her) or an “i want to date you” kind of way.

Help?